Sunday 16 June, 2024
I just completed my third retreat in a row––and fortunately I was able to do this one live––at the Episcopal House of Prayer here on the grounds of St. John’s Abbey. After I finished the retreat for the monks online last Friday, I still had the retreat for the nuns down in Maplewood, MN to do, but it was discerned (mutually) that I not come to them. They are an elderly community and quite nervous about catching Covid, and the sisters themselves too kept insisting that it would be better for me not to have to move to a new place so I could continue to heal. I was actually relieved by that. The monks offered for me to stay where I was, in the Bishop’s Suite in the cloister, which was comfortable enough, or to move over the Abbey Guest House next door. But it was also suggested that if I stayed in the monastery that I only go and get my supplies, wearing a mask, when the monks were in prayer or asleep, which was fair enough. To be honest it got to feel a bit creepy, and kind of awkward to be there and not be there at the same time––and I was ready for a change of atmosphere after being cooped up in the room for five days. And I love the Abbey Guest House where I had stayed twice before, and so I did move on Monday. And it was the right move. I’ve had such a lovely, relaxed week. I still easily kept my distance from other guests for the first day or two at meals, the monks let me use a conference room to do my retreat talks online, I had access to the university gym, and from my room on the bottom floor I have a gorgeous view of Lake Sagatagan and nothing else. I already told the monks who work here that if I ever come again, please remember that I want room 16.
So back to the travelogue… they were really great days in the studio in Portland. The last day we recorded some “choir” tracks, which was actually only four of us, doubled and then switching voices. One song for this collection, “We Knew the World Backward and Forward,” I had written for choir, though I have often performed it solo, and John and I thought, “Why not?” It was great fun and again has a whole new character with the full contingent of voices. John also had a great idea for adding four-part voices as accents on another piece, “Walk In Beauty,” which I think is going to be the stand-out piece on the album, and that was a perfect intuition. That is the great thing about working with a collaborator that you learn to trust after this many years. At first I thought, “Nah, a waste of time” but I checked that thought and followed the second one instead––“Let’s try it!” John has certainly allowed me the benefit of the doubt countless times.
That was a short day in the studio, good ol’ Gus uploaded everything every from his hard drive to mine, and I took off in the early afternoon. I am getting good at finding inexpensive hotel rooms, and I am certainly earning enough money to give myself that “luxury.” In the old days I might have driven through to San Francisco that night! But instead, I drove as far as Grants Pass, which put the worst of the mountain climbs behind me, had a good night’s sleep and set out for the longest part of the leg in the early morning. Grants Pass, by the way, is the city that has been in the news for trying to outlaw homelessness, if I remember correctly. There were a lot of signs in support of Trump ’24, and big loud trucks there. Not that those three elements necessarily go together, but maybe…
The next day I made it back to Bob and Ellen’s house in Hillsborough, and what they now call the “Cyprian Suite,” which, due to their graciousness, has become my anchorage for the year. I was able to repack my bags and leave some things behind, because from then on out I was not going to have the luxury of a car, which can become a kind of rolling suitcase, ever more stuffed with “just one more thing.” As fortune would have it, our friend Mark Hansen was in town from Singapore for all kinds of business in California and staying right there in the Bay Area. He and Bob know each other virtually only, from both of them serving on my Financial Advisory Board, but had never met in person. So Mark came over and we had a wonderful meal and evening together. The two of them still feel like my Advisory Board, and we all have so many common interests, there was no shortage of topics for conversation. Another one of those occasions where I am feeling so blessed, spoiled even, to be surrounded by such luminous souls and fine fine people.
A great night’s sleep and then a relaxed day driving south, with enough time to hit the gym for a good workout and sauna; I met John Dear, who was driving north while I was driving south, for a nice lunch and enjoyable visit as always, then my next cheap hotel room was in Morro Bay, with a light dinner from the local health food store. And the next morning I dropped the Mighty Prius off at the Monastery of the Risen Christ (without waking the brothers––or them even knowing I was there…), and Kim Parisi, one of our business folks, kindly gave me a ride to the airport in the wee hours of the morning and I was off to Minnesota, on a thankfully smooth uneventful flight. (The recent accounts of two airplanes hitting sudden severe turbulence, one of the dropping 6000 feet in a few seconds, that left passengers injured, have dampened my already ambivalent attitude toward air flight.) And the rest is backstory.
It has been a really good experience to be here for over two full weeks, to get to know the rhythm of the monastery itself, but also the rhythm of the land and the whole campus. I am going to miss the song of the loon which I have heard several times a day.
This last retreat was very low impact on me. I stayed at the Guesthouse still and walked over to the House of Prayer each day for my talks. It is material that I know very well and so required very little prep. I even had a PowerPoint all ready to go that I had forgotten I had put together for the recorded presentations I did for Louise last year. I have gotten very hooked on having the visual of the quotes, etc. with me, to engage in more than one sense and to aid people in writing things down, not to mention save on paper. It’s a great little place, the food as always was exquisite, very healthy and carefully prepared. And the space is in such good taste. It was a small group (the place only holds 10) and that made in very intimate, and of course gave me the opportunity not only to “practice” but to share my practice as well as my meandering thoughts. As the retreat ended I went over an joined statio with the monks so as to celebrate Eucharist with them and stayed on for Sunday brunch as well. This gave me a chance to see them all one more time and bring some closure to my ill-fated time with them. They were so gracious and warm, and we left each other with hopes to see each other again.
One other little serendipitous moment I didn’t mention: last Sunday I had a few hours with Adam Bucko and John Gribowich. Adam had several members of his virtual community here as is there norm, for a retreat. John, the priest from New York who tried his vocation with us and is now teaching high school in San Francisco, is a member of that community and has become a good friend to Adam. Another occasion where there was not a moment of lapse in the conversation except to catch our breath. As I wrote on Facebook, two men who ask all the right questions and give great responses too, real kindred spirits. For being in central Minnesota in the middle of nowhere, Collegeville is quite a crossroads.
Oh yes, and one more thing. Sr Delores Dufner, OSB, the well-known hymn writer who I have known for some years, searched me out when she found out I was going to be nearby––she's at St. Ben's women's monastery just down the road. She offered to drive over (at 85 years old) and pick me up to bring me over there for Vespers and dinner and a visit. Which she did and I did. We were also joined at dinner by Sr Helene Mercier who I know from Monastic Interreligious Dialogue, and we had a lively conversation, before Delores and I slipped into the rehearsal room and spent the last minutes together nerding out over hymn texts and melodies.
My younger sister and Mom along with nephew Aeson are supposed to arrive in Minneapolis today, in time for Father’s Day. They will head right out to Steve’s cabin on the lake in Spooner. My big sister, PJ, arrives tomorrow evening from Colorado. I am getting a ride into St Paul in the morning. I will pick up a rental car for PJ and I, go visit the good sisters in Maplewood (the ones I gave the online retreat for), maybe hit a gym and Whole Foods, and then PJ and I will head over to Spooner for the week, for a unique way to spend out family time together this year. I am really looking forward to it. My birthday is Wednesday (the feast, or rather the solemnity, of St Romuald). What a precious gift to be able spend it with my immediate family. And then blissfully nothing to do––at least no “work”–– until September, except some days in the studio back in CA (if you can call hanging out in the Magic Kingdom “work”).
Wishing you all peace this Father’s Day, thinking about my beloved Babbo, gone these three years now, and all of the young (and not so young) fathers who have taught me so much these past decades. Until then… may God grant us joy of heart and may peace abide among us.
