I met Jeremias for the first time several years ago, when I was still living in my hermitage in Corralitos. At the time he was just ending his time at Tabgha, the monastery on the northwestern shore of the Sea of Galilee that is traditionally thought to be the place of the multiplication of the loaves and fishes (Mark 6:30-46) and the fourth resurrection of Jesus (Jn 21:1-24). Jeremias gave me a little icon from Tabgha that had an image of the multiplication of the loaves for my cabin then and I am not sure why this little saying, in German, struck me so deeply: Und alle warden satt––“And all were satisfied.” Every time I see him, I am tempted to use that prhase for something, during my time with them at the Eremo of Sankt Romuald I kept saying it over and over again. And I have been saying it over and over again throughout my stay here in Hamburg too. My host, Petra, made a photocopy of a well-known folky song from one of their Catholic liturgical songbooks that uses the phrase too, but expands on it: Wenn jeder gibt, was er hat, dann werden alle satt––“When everyone gives what they have, then all will be satisfied.” Gosh, could just use that over and over again every day.
You’ve got to put your money where your mouth is we Americans say––and they do. There are several things admirable about the place. One of course is there dedication to silent meditation. There is a wonderful chapel upstairs one of the buildings, a long low room lined with zabutans and zafus, at the head of which is the Blessed Sacrament. It was interesting; these guys are so progressive in many ways, and they also embrace “traditional” Catholicism. And sitting in silent meditation in front of the Blessed Sacrament, with statues of Mary and the Sacred Heart of Jesus looking on, is certainly not everyone’s cup of tea. But it suits me well. I had just had a discussion about that very thing with someone in Poland who, quoting other teachers, was against having the Blessed Sacrament present during meditation, because “you need to focus more on the indwelling presence of God than any outer form.” I see the point, but I find it to be a false dilemma.
In that upper room they have an hour of silent meditation each day after early morning Lauds with Mass and a short breakfast, so generally between 8 and 9 AM. And everybody comes. They also do Compline there each night which they begin by singing mantras from India before an examination of conscience and a period of silence, and they end with one of them blessing everyone with the monstrance. In between they are singing the psalms in German but in pristine Gregorian chant. And that leads to another thing I really admire: the liturgies are done so well, simple and elegant, without any frills but with the basics done well (very Benedictine). And they sing very well together. The German Benedictines have put together a monastic Liturgy of the Hours in German that is all set to Gregorian tones that is apparently very widely used. I mentioned in the workshop I did last weekend (“on essentially vocal liturgical music”) how you need to experience Gregorian in a setting like that, as I did at San Miniato all those years ago and again there at Hildesheim, to appreciate what a domestic music it is, just bread and butter, once you get it in your bones. Neither Jeremias nor Benedikt read music, I take it, but they sing it beautifully, as do the others.
The other thing I like about the place (and I have noticed this at times among some of our Italian brothers as well, at Garda and Monte Giove especially) they do not make a big deal about distinguishing between the three goods of our charism––solitude, community and the Third Good (whatever it may be). Benedikt and now Andri, the Swiss monk, both serve as hospital chaplains; Axel is very involved with his yoga community. And they are all obviously dedicated to the contemplative aspect of our life including intentional times of solitude. On top of that they seem to have a joyful communal life. That is how it should be. Period.
I, on the other hand, felt very lazy during my stay! Part of it was my comfy room and I guess I was more tired than I thought. I kept saying to them that I felt more at home with them than I had felt in months. Every time I closed my eyes, I fell asleep. I did work a bit on my upcoming workshop and write a wee bit, but I was also reminding myself that I’m on sabbatical too and enjoyed leisurely walks in the countryside and one day a bike ride to town (in the driving rain) with Axel to go to the gym. Other than that, good food, and good company in a house full of good sharing and gentle laughter, and then they sent me off to the train station on Thursday for my time here in Hamburg.
Speaking of “lazy,” one challenge about all the travel coming up in the years ahead is what I have found already––and this is also one good justification for staying somewhere a long time. It’s just so hard in a new place to establish a kind of pattern, to “practice” at the same time and, especially, in the same place. Luckily, I’m an early riser so there is little chance that my morning prayers and meditations (and sometimes yoga and a run) are interrupted by activity. But afternoon and evenings are a little more problem. There is quite often something that someone wants me to do in the evening and I am ready to hit my “cell,” wherever that may be, and do my evening prayers and get to bed just as folks are gearing up for the evening activities! So between exercise, yoga, meditation, practicing the guitar, not to mention reading and writing, praying and meditating, it is so easy to cut corners. Fr. Thomas Keating told me, in the last conversation I had with him, which I cherish, that “it’s hard to go deeper when you’re on the speaker circuit.” And he should know! What has been brilliant about this sabbatical time is I have had wonderful break periods between “work,” three days with the Coronesi in Poland and then three days at Hildesheim before this work here in Hamburg for instance. But it does take discipline. I hope I can keep that up in the weeks, months and years ahead. This is also why having a good space to live in Rome is going to be of utter importance, somewhere to sink in to my own rhythm, and go deeper.
It will come as no surprise if I quote Prabhavananda’s commentary on the Yogas Sutras, How to Know God, yet again and I appreciated his warning (commentary on I:30-31) associating the tamas guna with sloth, which I also think of as the ancient noonday devil acedia. So easy to get lulled into sloth in the cell! Prabhavananda says that nearly all the distractions listed by Patanjali––sickness, mental laziness, doubt, lack of enthusiasm, sloth craving for sense pleasure, false perception, despair caused by failure to concentrate and unsteadiness in concentration––“come under the general heading of tamas. Sloth is the great enemy––the inspirer of cowardice, irresolution, self-pitying grief, and trivial hair-splitting doubts.” And an antidote to that, according to him, is actually japam, repetition of the sacred word or the holy name of God. This admonition comes right after his long discourse commenting on aphorisms 27-29 about the repetition of Om, with a beautiful quote from the Way of the Pilgrim and St. John Chrysostom, the latter of which wrote that “everywhere, wherever you find yourself, you can set up an altar to God in your mind by means of prayer.”
Of course, that is the purpose of carrying beads (a mala or a rosary): all I have to do is reach into my pocket to remind myself of my japam. Prabhavananda says when we do this, we “attack sloth on the subconscious level by quiet persistence in making japam.” Especially ever since my time up in Rishikesh in March this teaching about working on the subconscious level has stayed very much in my mind. Earlier Prabhavananda also writes about the samskaras, how they are at such a deep level that we hardly know, but they are affecting our moods and actions like sandbars effect the flow of water. These too can be flattened, if not erased completely, by our practice of meditation.
At the same time, he says we may actually be growing during times when our minds seem dark and dull. “So we should never listen to the promptings of sloth, which will try to persuade us that this dullness is a sign of failure.”
Heading to Rome on an overnight train today––Hamburg, Munich to Florence via Austria, then Flornece–Rome. I’ll be “home” hopefully in time for pranzo. More on the time in Hamburg later.
Und alle werden satt.
